Bob DePasquale

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We’re Owed Nothing but Get to be Great

I type this on the 20th anniversary of the terrorist attacks on September 11th, 2001.


There will be plenty of reminiscing today.  This entry will be not be directly related to my experience on that day.  However, I have more memories from that Tuesday than any other day of my life.  You can hear the account in Speaking of Impact episode 1 or various other shows I have joined on my “Appearances” page.


My log of topics always seems to come through for relevant ideas.  I have 820 potential blog topics.  It’s safe to say that E-Impact will never be at a loss for content.  


Last week was a great example of how the next topic in line just fit well with our podcast guest’s commentary.  It was the week of courage defeating fear.  I hope you found some inspiration in E-Impact 65 and Speaking of Impact episode 62.


Interestingly enough, John Davis, our podcast guest last week, had some amazing stories about being overseas and performing for soldiers fighting the war on terror.  


This week also seems to fit together well as our guest this Thursday has lived a life devoted to helping other people.  Sylvia Brown wants to make sure people are smart donors and support the most effective causes.


Political Power


The Taliban recently took over Afghanistan as American troops left the area.  Some of the videos from the area are like a scene from action horror movies.   I am in constant prayer for the people there and the conflict as a whole.


I am listening to a podcast interview with Peter Bergen.  See his recent article, Osama bin Laden changed history on 9/11, but not in the ways he expected, on CNN’s website.  His research and commentary are fascinating.  I would not be able to effectively explain the worldview of the people he has studied and I encourage you to learn from his work.


It’s All About Me


My 9/11 experience was very personal.  I don’t mean that in a good, or “deep” way.  It was an attack on my livelihood (as far as I was concerned).  There are some additional finer points of clarification in Speaking of Impact episode 21 with my cousin, Gunnar Esiason.  This show gives a good feel for my struggle during the time after the 9/11 attacks.  


I was a freshman football college football player in NY.  I felt invincible.  On September 6, 2001 I was diagnosed with cancer.  Two days later my uncle’s best friend lent my parents, who were in town from FL, his car so they could take their ill son around to doctor’s appointments.  Three days later he died in the attacks and I spent most of the day in my car trying to avoid eminent danger (cancer seemed like nothing at that point) and get to my family.  


Somewhere in the next few days I felt some of the patriotic force that many of us Americans experienced.  I am no Pat Tillman, but it was real.     I was determined to prevent the attacks and my illness takeover my life.  Similar to the patriotic feeling of freedom and democracy, I was going to govern my own fate.  


On a positive note, I recovered physically and was able to resume some semblance of a normal college experience.  But years later, I developed a better understanding of how my life was effected by the situation.


Faith and Rights


I am a faithful guy.  This is not a secret.  I don’t think I could describe myself as such if it was a secret. 


I have mentioned the ministry that changed my life, given me numerous great friends, and introduced to my best friend, my wife.  Spoke Folk's Bible theme verses are from the book of Ephesians.  This is book is one twenty-one epistles.


Epistle: a letter


This is the shortest definition I have ever searched for on the internet.  It fits though.  The epistles were letters written to different cities of Biblical times.  They provide some very poignant directions that Christians take as instruction for all people to this day.  If you think about this being the only way to communicate back then, it’s easy to understand the importance of the writings.  


The Spoke Folk verses are the first through fifth of Ephesians’ fourth chapter.  In them, The Apostle Paul urges the people of Ephesus to “live a life worthy of the calling”.  He goes on to say that we should be completely humble, gentle, patient, and bearing with one another in love.  This tells me that we are called to do one primary thing - love each other, regardless of anything else.


Jihad: a struggle or fight against the enemies of Islam


I don’t consider Islam to be an enemy.


But, I do acknowledge that war, ethnic cleansing, and terrorism exist.  They don’t seem to be worthy of the calling.  I imagine that some of my ancestors (I am of 25% German heritage) were Nazis.  This hurts.


So, what is right?  And what are our rights?


My faith tells me that I have one everlasting gift and that Grace Wins Every Time.  Matthew West reminds us of this.  The race that offers us redemption from our sin and everlasting life is free.  It’s literally heavenly.  We must simply believe.  The Earth however, owes us nothing.  


It’s up to us now to provide grace.  


Ironically, jihad’s second definition is:


The spiritual struggle within oneself against sin


Our own personal struggle with our shortcomings is Earthly.  It’s what prevents us from living a life worthy of the calling.  


We don’t think we are worthy.  I am here to tell you otherwise.  


You are absolutely worthy of the calling to love one another.  It doesn’t matter what you believe is beyond this life.  


I will continue to preach what I believe and I encourage you to do the same.  But whatever your methods are, make sure they are based in love.


Living it Daily


Prior to writing this entry, I finished my first round of revisions for my book, “Personal Finance in a Public World”.  


Spoiler alert: The book is concentrated on developing healthy financial and technology habits.


This is relevant because healthy habits go way beyond my book.  See James’s Clears,  “Atomic Habits” and Speaking of Impact episode 58 with Mark Glicini.


Everyday that we have on this Earth is a blessing and opportunity to do something great.  


I am twenty years removed from the most trying time in my life.  I have now been alive longer after that time than before.  It makes me feel the calling to live the lessons I learned during that time. 


I learned these things:


  1. Life is precious.

  2. Don’t assume you will always have what you do.

  3. What you want is not always what you need.

  4. We are all unique.

  5. Expectations are fleeting.

  6. Humans are a loving breed.

  7. Crisis breaks traditions but creates bonds.

  8. No one is invincible.

  9. Family is not bound by genetics.

  10. Physical illness is a mental battle.

  11. Prayer is powerful.

  12. The world owes us nothing, but we get something everyday.



Live a life worthy of the calling everyday.  This is most easily done by developing great habits.



Opportunities to be Great



What is your reactionary definition of great?



Do you take it from the sports world like me?



Tom Brady and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are great.



Is it from the tech world?



Apple is great.



Maybe it’s from entertainment.  Jurassic Park was a great movie.



I believe there are endless examples of greatness.  As I mentioned above, we are all unique.  We have different thoughts and ideas of what is worthy of praise.  With that in mind, I have just one request.



Be great everyday.



I don’t mean every moment of everyday.  But, you can do something great daily.  



As much as I think Tom Brady’s accomplishments as a forty-four year old quarterback are amazing, I know there is only one of him.  The good news is that greatness isn’t actually what we first think.



Greatness is living a worthy life and a worthy life is one that loves.



We all have an opportunity to love someone everyday.  And that someone can be anyone on the Earth, including ourself.



The ancient Greeks had six words for love!



Read the article for a detailed description of eros, philia, lulus, agape, pragma, philautia.  



I’d like to highlight agape.  This is love for everyone.  I understand that this may be a challenging thought on the anniversary of such a hateful event.



How can we love everyone?  We can’t always.  But, we can make it our business to express love in some fashion to someone everyday.

Balloons are a great metaphor for spreading love everywhere: no specific target, just throughout the air.



It’s unfortunate, but empathy seems to be on the decline.  My conversation with Ed Evarts on Speaking of Impact 59 triggered ideas of how empathetic leadership will change our world.



Impactmakers will lead with empathetic agape.



Right Now



It “Starts Right Here” (2 Chronicles 7:14, another Bible verse this time from a different section than the epistles).



Thank you Casting Crowns.



Surrender your pride and turn from your ways.



My challenge is that our pride ultimately gets in our way.  When I was eighteen, I was full of pride.  It took incredible tragedy, illness, and two years for me to surrender the majority of it.  I’m far from perfect and still have pride like the next person.  However, I am committed to pushing it aside to so that selfless love (agape) and grace win every time.  



I cannot promise you that terrorism will end forever or that cancer will be cured.  But, I will claim that you are indeed worthy of the calling to love others.



Start living it RIGHT NOW.