Bob DePasquale

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The State of Motivation: How to Avoid That Motivational “High”

Consistency never goes away.  


The most obvious statements are often filled with value.  We tend to take them for granted.  This is bad.  


We assume a lot of things in our lives.  In many cases, it’s acceptable and it’s often essential for efficiency.  For example, I usually brush my teeth before I go to bed.  Admittedly, I’ve missed a night or two, but it’s not normally a big part of my plan before going to sleep.  Usually, I just assume that I have a toothbrush, toothpaste, and running water.  I don’t have to allow for time to find those things.  Sadly, some people do.   In my world, this is not the case.  


It’s entirely reasonable for me to take for granted that I will be able to brush my teeth in just a few minutes without having to search for the necessary items.  But, what about those things that shouldn’t be taken for granted?


I don’t feel that I’m missing any lessons by brushing my teeth without much thought.  I do, however, feel that I’m missing a lot of other lessons by living an “efficient” life. 


One issue that I have identified is the temptation to find the next best thing.  I have a natural inclination to explore, whether physically or mentally.


I listen to most podcasts on 3x (up to 5x) speed.  


I speed read.


I eat too fast.


I skip a step while running up and down the stairs.


I clear out my e-mail while on conference calls.


There is an uncontrollable need to gather as much information as possible as quickly as possible.


Ironically, I drive rather slow (there are other reasons for this).  But, I’m often doing more than driving (not texting).


My wife and I love to travel and see new things.  If you ask her, she’ll tell you that I have to read as many artifact descriptions as possible and listen to all the audio pieces at a museum.  I have to peer around every corner in a new place (even the airport).  I’ve seen every inch of Sheremetyevo.


Somewhere mixed in with this desire for information is an interest in the cutting edge.  I am fascinated by what is far away (past and present).  I love dinosaurs and information about space travel.  A time machine would be the greatest gift I could ever receive.  Included in this desire is technology.  Give me the most modern stuff and let me figure it out.  


When I was a kid, the last year’s version of Madden NFL wasn’t good enough.  I needed updated rules, rosters, and graphics.  Apply this logic to every major sport video game.


Some of these things are certainly reasonable.  However, it shows the mindset that can be troubling.  I may be an extreme case (maybe not), but the concept exists.  People are trained (whether we are trying to do it or not) from an early age to overload information.  

Some people work in technology.  The best of the best are lauded and given great wealth to lead technology companies.  Have you ever been on Facebook?  Did you “Google” something today?  Do you have an iPhone?  I would say these are great tools.  But, there is a balance between using them to make our present lives better and searching for the next best thing.  


I have provided numerous examples to illustrate my point.  There are countless more, but I’ll spare you the additional read time.  Just understand that there are some great things that span the test of time.  


Consistency


Consistently applying essential habits is more important than looking for better habits.  We are all human.  We have been human since Adam and Eve.  We will be human until we’re not (another obvious but valuable statement). 


We will always have the same essential parts of life as long as we are humans.  


As illustrated above, recent history and technology has taught us to push towards the future.  Remember the E-Impact Entry called Putting Irons in the Fire?  The Industrial Revolution was a great part of history.  Although, our basic needs haven’t changed.  The technological revolution is among us, but our basic needs are the same. 


The Motivational “High”


Have you ever had a motivational high?  How was that dopamine hit?  It’s a drug.  We all crave it.  Technology often provides it at a faster pace.  Unfortunately, it causes problems.


First, just like most things, once we have some we want more.  We will never be satisfied with one experience of something that feels good.  


You might say that dopamine is not addictive and Dr. David J. Ley would agree.  Read “No, Dopamine is Not Addictive.”  What is interesting though, is that dopamine doesn’t actually make you feel good.  Dr. Ley says it alerts your brain prior to the good feeling to be aware.  This tells me that we are actually aware of the experience before it even comes.  It’s a habit that we have formed.  It’s conscious.  We can control it.


Did you ever study Classical Conditioning and Pavlov’s Dogs?  We are smarter than dogs.  We are aware that the feeling following the release of dopamine is good.  We don’t consciously emit the hormone, but we know what leads to it and what it leads to.


In addition to the desire for more, Science Daily describe how a “New model explains role of dopamine in immune regulation”.  This tells me that it’s not healthy to overload on dopamine even if we were able to find a way to live in the “high” state.


We seek the motivational high.  And while it feels good, it should be a “high”.  It shouldn’t, and really can’t be a plateau.  


So, I’m saying you should just try to live a boring life.  


“How are things going?”


“Oh, you know.  Same ‘ol, same ‘ol.”


“That’s great!  You must be really healthy!”


Not quite.


The State of Motivation


You should develop consistent habits and be prepared for the “highs”.  I’ve already told you what to do When Opportunity Knocks.  And I believe that if you are ready to kick down the door, you’ll find plenty of “highs”.  You’ll live in a state of Motivation.


The best way to find a state of motivation is to have a cause or goal that you are passionate about.


In the spring, after I returned to the athletic field from my battle with testicular cancer (see Speaking of Impact Episode 1 for that story),  I was pretty motivated to play.  I would have done anything my coaches asked me to do.  And I did.  


“DePasquale!” (Pronounced pass-SKWALL-ay)


“Yeah, coach!”


“Get over here!”


“Coach, I’m right here…”


“Take a knee.”


“Yessir.” collapses into kneeling position bruising knee on the ground


“The punter’s hurt.”  (Joe Nolan the punter made an appearance on Episode 3 of Speaking of Impact.  Check it out for a fascinating conversation about the social media world.)


“Bummer, how’s he doing?”


“I don’t care.  He can’t punt.”


At this point it crossed my mind, but there was no way they could ask me to punt.  I did play soccer back in the day (see Speaking of Impact Episode 13 for a recap on my soccer career), but there was a reason I stopped at ten years old.  We had a back-up punter and a kicker that could do it.


“Why am I kneeling over here when the rest of the team is practicing?”  (Now I began to think I was in trouble.)


“Here catch this.” fires a football like an underhanded rocket at me


I caught about ten balls with ease while on a knee and coach got the attention of Chris, our Kicker.  I didn’t realize it, but in about two minutes I earned the holding job.  Prestigious, huh?  This is usually done by the Punter at most colleges and on all professional teams.


It might be embarrassing more than anything to say “I earned the holding job.”, but it gave me a purpose.   


I didn’t feel I could run or cut (essential skills for a wide receiver) like I could prior to my illness, but I could still catch (another essential skill for a receiver).  


As a holder you really aren’t looking for any glory, or a “high”.  You’re just trying not to mess it up.  I was determined to never make a mistake.   


I was in a state of constant motivation for the next few months.  The special teams coach gave me a “kicker-ball” (see this business insider article about why NFL Kickers squeeze the ball to give you some insight as to why kickers need a special ball) to practice with.   


Sounds like it would be just me and my ball for the summer.  There was a problem though.  I can’t throw myself a ball from seven yards away.  I needed a partner.  I have mentioned to you that I like to travel.  Although, my travel in college was a bit different, I still moved around quite a bit in the summer.  Everywhere I went I brought my “kicker-ball” and had to find people to throw it to me (this would have been an amazing “man-on-the-street bit”).  


Have you ever asked someone to simulate a field goal with you?  Of course, the snapper (the person throwing the ball to the holder) has to throw it through his or her legs.  Believe it or not, this is really hard to do properly (even when you don’t have opposing players trying to run through you).  My “snappers” would inevitably bend over and launch the ball between their legs with incredible inaccuracy.  It was futile. 


Thankfully, when I was at home for a period of time, my Dad turned out to be the best fill-in snapper.  He was able to fire the ball underhanded like coach did that first day I was “trying-out” as the holder.  


When Dad wasn’t around I had to find creative ways to simulate the snap.  I spent a lot of time making sure I could handle the ball no matter how it came to me.  We weren’t going to lose any games because of a bad hold.   


I was consistently motivated by what, to most, would be an insignificant task.  But, it was essential to making a field goal and an extra point in a football game.  


The State of Motivation is wonderful place.  You can never be there too long.  It’s enjoyable.  It’s productive.  It’s healthy.  And it’s CONSISTENT.  


My favorite, and one of the most well-known states of motivation is wellness.  This state effects so many areas of life.  

If you take care of yourself, it improves your life as family member, professional, volunteer, impactmaker and many other things.  It leads you to workout, sleep enough, sleep well, eat well, stretch, meditate, and pray, amongst other things.  You can do these daily and though you may not always feel like doing them, you know they are good for you.  Also, one really overly strenuous workout can hurt you, but many hard workouts over a period of time can extend your life.  Consistency is key. 


There are countless motivations.  Actually, you know from last week that You are Your Motivation.  You don’t have to go anywhere.


Find your passion and live in a state of motivation.  Don’t seek the “highs”.  If you don’t find them you’ll live in a sate of “lows”.  If you keep finding them,  you’ll never be satisfied.  Let them come to you as you live for a purpose.  


Motivation is best applied as a habit, not habitually applied.