Quality Time is Better Than Quantity of Time
We all want more. More stuff. Bigger is better. Max is facts (just made that up).
The impactmaker movement is designed (that word might be a stretch) to find more people to do more good work. Therefore, we are just like the rest of people in wanting more. E-Impact 54 taught us that there are times where it is good to be like everyone else. This week, though, is different-meaning it’s good to be different.
I give some practical examples of this from a financial perspective in my book, “Personal Finance in a Public World”. This technological age of information has allowed us to find things easily. What’s interesting though is that as fast as we can get information, we spend more and more time using the devices that allow us to gather the data. You would think that with the speed that we can get things we would spend a limited amount of time using these things. However, they are so well designed to keep us on the platforms that we don’t put them down.
I believe that the quality of information that we find using our smartphones decreases with use. I find myself frequently referencing an application for a single piece of information but I end up accessing tens and hundreds of pieces. The first few “additions” could be helpful and relevant in my situation as the algorithms are intelligent enough to feed us related information. However, it quickly becomes a modern game of “telephone” and before you know it, your original purpose is so far removed that you’re just killing time.
Use it Well
I think that we need to capitalize on the high quality device time. Use it when you’re in the “zone”.
CNBC has a nice article called, “Why you should be reducing screen time and 3 simple ways to do it”. I agree with all of the premises. But, I would like to add a key point. The drawbacks of screen time seem to amplify with time. The benefits that most technology companies and people associate with phones are worthy. They make a lot of things in life easier. This tells me that the devices are useful and that we should implement the technology in our lives. The problem is that we overdo it.
It’s more evident than ever that quality time is more important than the quantity of it. Things are amplified in the 21st Century (specifically this new decade, COVID-19 has something to do with it).
The Good Stuff
At the risk of spoiling the close of my book, I will say that it is our relationships that matter the most. As much as the screen time can be used for good, it is not the only answer. If we can ultimately reduce our screen time by maximizing its quality, then we need to fill the rest of the time with other quality things.
Here’s some other good stuff to do:
Converse with loved ones - Ask your kids, spouse, and other family members what’s going well and what’s not in life. You might be surprised by their answer. And that’s okay. That’s why you ask.
Reading something that teaches you (non-fiction) - Find a subject you want to learn about an do some research.
Exercise - This might be favorite example of something that is truly about quality and not quantity. The fast you run, the more weight you throw around (without hurting yourself, of course), the harder and better you are training your body. You don’t have to workout for 2 hours a day. Mark Glicini from Speaking of Impact episode 58 told us to sweat every day; no matter how much.
Sing/Play an instrument - There’s something about music. This comes from someone who couldn’t hear a note to save his life. This is quality reflection time.
Prayer/Meditation - I happen to be a faithful guy and prayer time with God is important to me. Whatever it means to you, it can be some of the most quality time of the day you spent.
Gratitude Journaling - This can just be plain journaling and is somewhat related to prayer and meditation. I find that the focus on gratitude provides the greatest effect. Try to think of things that are not the most recognizable. Ask yourself what you take for granted.
Cooking (followed by eating of course) - Food is essential to survival. I don’t have any scientific evidence to this. But, what’s an E-Impact entry without a good anecdote? I believe that cooking something very soothing. It doesn’t have to be a meal for fifty. It can be something very simple just for you. The mind and body prepares to eat. You salivate, the stomach produces acid, and your core muscles contract. Subconsciously, it means something positive. You can make it conscious.
Writing - This is different from journaling. Here, I am referring to something less biographical. It could be fiction. It could be a teaching or just a story that you may (or may not) want to share. It’s working on your communication skills and may ultimately be used for good in the world.
Yoga/Stretching - This is not exercise. There are forms of yoga and stretching that can certainly burn some calories. File those under the above item. This one is for mind and body recovery. It’s what you do after exercise to care for your muscles (mental and physical). It helps you maximize the quality of your actual exercise time. So by definition, it is it’s own quality time.
Spoke Folk
Spoke Folk has come up many times in my impactmaking. It’s because it made a huge impact on my life. I recently returned from a Spoke Folk trip (South Dakota, 3 weeks ago), or “tour”, and today returned home from meeting with a bunch of Spoke Folkers (people who have been on a trip) 3 hours ago) from that tour at my church. We were practicing so that we can present what we experienced in South Dakota.
Here’s a picture of the group on the last day in South Dakota
There are 365 days in a year. They’re all a blessing. In fact, everyone is highlighted in my gratitude time (every morning). I almost lost the rest of mine (hear Speaking of Impact episode 1). However, Spoke Folkers like to call the trips they go on the best twelve of days of summer (or even the year). The reason is because we pack a whole bunch of quality time into twelve quick days. Ironically, those days go by faster than the other 353. But, we love them the most.
Not every day is a great day. But, there are plenty of opportunities every year.
The days of a Spoke Folk tour are filled with many of the things that are listed above. It really is a quality experience. It can’t last forever, though. It must end. In reality, it exists to end. We are there so we can practice great habits and do a better job of implementing them in our lives when we get home.
Spoke Folk is a mission trip that teaches high school and college age students how to be better in missionaries in their daily lives. It’s about quality time all the time-not just when we are in a special environment.
Human Connection
I will continue the commercial for Spoke Folk briefly. The organization creates the perfect environment to make you aware of the importance of quality time.
My best friends in the world, including my wife, were met through Spoke Folk. There is no denying the relationships I have developed.
I haven’t even mentioned to you what we do on a tour (at least in this entry, I have before). It’s a biking musical ministry. But, more importantly it’s the ultimate human connection vehicle.
Our human relationships are what carries us through life. Solitary confinement is considered to be the harshest of punishments in our society. This is because we, as humans, need to belong. We need to care and be cared for. We needs to love and be loved. Loved ones are most important.
The first thing that one should think of when seeking quality time is their human relationships. All of the things in the list above can be done with other people. Some require it.
I believe that finding quality time is simply about stepping away from clients, prospects, employees, bosses, and colleagues to be with the people that you care about the most. This is not a slight to the people you work with (some may even be loved ones). It’s just a prioritization.
Make Time
When I first started my career as a financial representative, we were encouraged to schedule certain things in our day. We were supposed to make a certain amount of phone calls. We had to do Computer Based Training (CBTs). We also had regional meetings at which we were supposed to be present. Thankfully for my sake, digital calendars were available at that point. I had a lot of things to schedule that I wasn’t used to.
I spent years prioritizing numerous business tasks with a “model week”. I was given a couple different documents to help me but I ended up making my own Excel spreadsheet that “locked in” and color coded multiple activities. I knew when I was e-mailing, dialing, networking, calculating, even sleeping. But, there was one thing that I didn’t know. When was I going to spend time with my wife?
It wasn’t until years into my career that I was at a presentation about networking. At that event, I learned something about networking that you wouldn’t expect. It was that networking was secondary to the existing relationships that meant the most to me. The presenter had us all put family time in our calendar and color code it with the highest priority. It was not to be moved. It didn’t necessarily have to be a long time or take up most of the calendar. It just had to be prioritized. It was quality time, not any specific quantity of time. This was a game changer. I was a better husband, worker, and general person for it.
Your Quality
I can consider the quality of your time to be a great measure of the quality of your character. The more enriching the things you do, the better you’ll be.
You can’t lack in quality time if you consider yourself an impactmaker.
Don’t be an impactfaker!
Yes, I said it. There are some imposters out there who believe that making an impact is overworking, overselling, and winning at work, business, and image. You have to waste a lot of time to do those things. It’s wasteful because it’s not fulfilling anything but earthly desires.
Make time for loved ones. Make time for significance. Make time for impact.