Indelible Lessons: Are They Learned or Taught?

I typically write the E-Impact Blog on Saturday’s after teaching English to people in foreign countries.  The experience of being an educator is really interesting.  There are so many different ways to learn and when you have the responsibility of helping people do so, you experience just how unique the human mind is.  

I have written previously about marrying into a family of educators.  I still don’t identify as an educator like my family, but I have realized that we are all educators in some way.  The students I work with are eager to learn a language that they have very little, if any, experience with.  

I believe that much of learning is desire.  I also believe that traditional methods of assessment are faulty.  

Memorizing or Learning?

Over the years I spent in school, I spent a lot of time memorizing material that I was to be “tested” on.  I was motivated, but I didn’t necessarily have the desire to learn.  My competitive spirit led me to produce the grades I needed relative to my classmates.  Did that make me a good student?  Perhaps, but I felt like I did a lot of memorization.   The application was often lacking.

The Gettysburg Address story in the October 13th E-Impact is great proof that motivation can really push you to accomplishment.   I’m not sure what could be actionable in replacement of memorizing what I did for that assignment, but I was just “playing in the sandbox” that was 6th grade.  I like to think that if it was something more actionable, I would have still done whatever it took to get an “A”.

Recently, I have also had the opportunity to take a course at Columbia University about teaching financial planning topics.  The course spent much time covering theory and not technical points.  This was an enlightening experience because I was a student learning how to be a teacher.  It’s a little bit of a “chicken or the egg” scenario.  Most people in the class agreed that a good instructor needs to facilitate experiences rather than share wisdom.  We talked multiple times about the undesirable “sage from the stage.”  

Think about the most effective lessons you learned in school.  Do you remember the best workbook you ever completed?  What about the best multiplication tables?  I wonder if you could pass your Advanced Placement exams again.  What sticks out to me are the best projects, the things I built (whether they were three-dimensional or written), the dissections, and the presentations. 

Creativity and Impact

I understand that young minds need to mature.  They need to “practice” thinking.   In that case, many school systems successfully prepare kids to  use their minds effectively in society.  But this is about IMPACT.  And we know that impact doesn’t just happen.  It takes a certain desire to make a difference.  It requires more than directions.  It requires curiosity and experience.  At a certain point, a young person is prepared and should be encouraged to learn what they want to learn through experience.  

The most creative people that I know don’t hesitate often.  They are creative not only because they are intelligent, they are creative because they are comfortable trying new things.  In fact, many of them thrive on it.  This has come up before.  They are comfortable being uncomfortable.  Check out Episode 11 of Speaking of Impact for more insight from Gregoire Narcisse about this subject.  

Experiences in Learning

So what is an indelible lesson?  And what is just a lesson?

Did you ever burn your hand on the stove when you were younger?  We’ve all heard the one about the kid who reached up and touched the burner and learned his lesson the hard way.  

One of my friends growing up told me that his dad gave a him a cigarette when he was kid and had him take a draw.  He never touched one again.  I’m sure there are even more extreme examples, but the point is that experience can teach a lesson awfully quickly and unforgettably.    

The Unexpected Remote

When I was in college (oh no, not another college story) I had plenty of experiences.  Some were enjoyable, some were terrible (see the July 14th E-Impact), others were just funny, but many were unexpected.  I believe that those unplanned experiences are often the most educational.  

If you remember my experiences from Episode 1 of Speaking of Impact (also from last week’s Episode 21), you’ll know that my second semester of college was more like a first for the average student.  

After returning to Hofstra University for my second semester of my freshman year, I was welcomed back to Long Island New York by my family.  It was a pretty emotional time.  I had a second lease on life and a chance to get back to a “normal” college kid’s life.  

Originally, I had driven my Ford Probe up to school (this part never made it into the other times I’ve told the story).  I must publicly thank my Aunt Di-Di who passed while I was in high school and left me a couple thousand dollars with which I bought the Probe.  Rest in peace Di-Di.

I expected to get back to my uncle’s house (where I would stay for a night prior to getting back to campus) and find the low to the ground, not-so-winter-friendly vehicle buried under a snow pile.  To my surprise, it was gone.  The family had replaced it with a Ford Explorer Sport Trac (they love Fords).  The Sport Trac is a sports utility vehicle with a bed.  It’s a much better vehicle to be driving around up there that time of the year.  I was flabbergasted (I’ve always wanted to use that word in the blog).  Honestly, I didn’t even get to say good-bye to my first car that I bought and took care of all by myself.  What an accomplishment, haha.  How could I complain though?  It probably wasn’t ideal for me to be driving it around given it’s style and age.  

The Sport Trac was lathered with testosterone.  It had big tires (or at least a lot bigger than the Probe), a huge grill (or battering ram), fog lights, a cover for the bed, and they had conveniently taken my speakers and sound system out of the Probe and installed it (with any upgrades or conversions needed) in the Sport Trac.  I loved it.  Bumpin’!

After driving the Explorer around for a month or so, I felt I had experienced everything it had to offer.  It was my car and I took care of it as much as I could.  One day though, I was scared and disappointed in my own carelessness.  I came out of class on a normal day and after a brief conversation with some friends, headed out to the parking lot to my car.  It was running.  What!?

How could my car have been running?  How long was it running?  Who started it?  Why did they not drive it away (lucky me)?  Strange.

I got in, hit the brake, and it turned off.  I was worried it was malfunctioning.  Thankfully, I put the key in the ignition, started it up, and drove back to the dorm hall.  Still confused, I went about my business for the rest of the day.

A few weeks later, I was leaving the dorm and came out to a running car again.  I was so confused.  I look at the car and second guessed myself.  Did I never shut it off when I got home the night before?  I tried to get in and it was locked.  Out of frustration, I mashed the buttons on the key fob (keyless entry had just begun to be popular).  It shutoff.  Ugh!  What is going on.  Help!  I have car ghosts!  Last time I was able to just open it and get in.  At least if I left it on I locked it this time. 

Rather than throw the keys across the parking lot (a normal reaction for me), I squeezed the fob as hard as I could to the point my palms hurt.  Amazingly, the car started!  I was totally creeped out.  Remote starters weren’t popular yet.  It took me another a minute or so to realize that I was the one turning it on.  And it didn’t actually take squeezing the fob as hard as I could.  In fact, it was really sensitive.  So sensitive that I had accidentally started the Sport Trac a couple times while it was in my pocket.

I felt pretty dumb.  No one told me.  I don’t even know if anyone knew (other than maybe the previous owner) that the Sport Trac had a remote starter.  But once I figured out that it did, I used it all the time.  Especially, in the winter.  I never had to get into a cold car.  However, it was possible that I never figured this out and that great feature went completed wasted.  

In reality, it would have been much easier if I would have just been taught that there was a remote starter.  Also, it was not essential to life and I’m sure I would have survived had I never figured it out.  

Indelible Lessons

Many things in life that are much more important are learned through experience.  You have to desire those experiences and be willing to learn whatever comes from them.  You may not know the exact lesson.  But rest assured, you’re going to learn and grow.  And some of those lessons, the most important ones, will be indelible.

I believe that indelible lessons are unable to be forgotten because of their importance and not because they are simply memorable.  A memory is one thing, a lesson is another.  

There’s a whole site dedicated to indelible learning.  Check out indeliblelearning.com.  They have games.  You can’t go wrong.

One great thing about indelible learning is that it is for all ages and can help you with an entire career.  Read the Forbes article Indelible Impressions:  Early Lessons for Long Careers by Mat Zucker.  I’m sure we could all use a few more memories to help us navigate our daily efforts.  

I should wrap this up with a reading that my educator family would appreciate.  COVID-19 as a Teacher: It has Taught Us Indelible Lessons provides some relevant examples to our current situation.  Whether we wanted it or not, 2020 was coming, and there are some unforgettable things that have learned from.  This is good.

It is appropriate to say that it doesn’t matter whether it’s a formal classroom setting, or general life, indelible learning is a result of engaging, unique experiences.  

Expose yourself to the best experiences.  Learn well.